Blogging became a daily struggle around here, as was my article “How I overcome my limits and became the woman I am today“. Naturally, receiving any negative feedback is upsetting but you live, you learn, and you move on.
So, as I was writing my next post, I had “Love my Life” by Robbie Williams on repeat and BOOM! It hit me and “How to Handle Criticism” was born.
Step 1: I write about it.
… or sing about it, dance about it, paint about it, etc.
Let the experience teach you whatever you need to learn and then express yourself. I use any criticism I get as blog post inspiration.
If someone tells me I can’t do something, I write about it. If someone says something about my pictures, I post more pictures. The key is to use the criticism to propel you forward on your own way. Your focus shouldn’t be to please other people. You should never change for other people, otherwise, you end up losing yourself entirely.
If you just act like you’re important and you do it with confidence, people will believe you.
I wasn’t exactly sure if I’d be able to get an invitation and a front row seat at Fashion Weeks, I just followed my instinct! “I’m here because I’m a Fashion Victim and I’m writing about it on my blog” – sure enough, and I made my way and watched the magic happen without having to say much at all.
And I wrote about these amazing Fashion Week experiences on my website every time I was there. Aside from the palpitating emotions that spur as soon as the music starts before a fashion show, there’s much to be observed and acquired, if you pay attention of course. And since I’m someone who’s essentially addicted to fashion, I paid attention to every single detail.
If there are social skills to be learned in fashion, let it be at a fashion show…
Step 2: Don’t worry about your haters.
One of the best ways to handle criticism is to embrace it and create controversy.
Controversial? Yes, controversy sells!
I use criticism as positively as possible, and for me, that means using it as inspiration. You know how they say: If you don’t have any critics, you probably don’t have success either.
Haters are your confirmation of doing something right! Haters they don’t really hate you, they hate themselves because you’re a reflection of what they wish to be.
Never focus your attention on what the world has to say about you. Rather turn your focus inside and listen to what your inner voice has to say to you. You can find the answers to the most complicated questions of life from your deepest self. Have faith in yourself! All the power is in your biology already. Be conscious of that power and bring it out.
Remember, truth is indestructible, virtue is indestructible, purity is indestructible.
Step 3: Learn to shrug it off
Pretty much right in line with the point above, if someone is an asshole, you have to be able to not care.
You cannot be sensitive in a highly competitive industry like fashion! Because you’ll just be eaten up alive because assholes are everywhere especially when you’re quite a nobody (to them, that is…). Despite experiencing a lot of unpleasant persons during these 3 years of blogging, I just ignored it and still had the time of my life. It’s like a true Devil Wears Prada experience.
Despite this, you should always BE KIND. Not that I saw any spectacular acts of kindness, but seeing so many assholes around me was, even more validation that you should always take the high road – be kind. No one likes an asshole. And asshole remarks and demeanor will NEVER be forgotten!
Not only that, be sure that people talk about an asshole behavior more often than your kindness! So do yourself a favor, no matter how much stress or pressure or anger you feel, be nice.
Step 4: Make no apologies.
I have a clear message: ‘Sorry… I ain’t sorry’.
There’s no mistaking and you should live unapologetically. Unless someone’s feelings got hurt from malicious intent, there is no reason you should apologize for being you. It’s your life and no one should judge you for how you live it!
It’s impossible to please everyone and you’re going to encounter people who just don’t like you no matter what you do. You’ll receive backlash, criticism, and hate but don’t let it get you down.
Because you know what they say when in doubt BE YOU!
Step 4: BE Flexible.
Flexibility is the key to success!
Fashion is ongoing and can feel even faster than the rate of a normal life. The adrenaline and the pressure exposes a lot of unexpected emotions and many times, unwanted. There’s a lot of uncertainty and sometimes things are falling apart! Other times, they fall together, but regardless of which way they’re falling, the only one way to win is to adapt.
Everything you say or do should be a positive reaction to someone else.
Be above it all: Give in to no argument and avoid petty gossip.
It’s difficult to be a “lady” in today’s society. There exists unprecedented pressure to be perfect and cruel competition. Speak badly of no one. Don’t follow the wrong examples of others. Doing so makes you be like everyone else, and not only are you different, you are unique and better. Pleasantly surprise others by exceeding their expectations when you think, speak and act.
Do only what you want to be done to you!
How do you handle criticism? Tell me in the comments below!
Outfit: Ylana Shop
Location: Cincsor.Transilvania Case de Oaspeti